Judy age Seven
Being Wise Seventeen May 30, 2021
This year a lot of people wished me
Happy Birthday. I turned eighty-four.
A significant year. Twelve times seven
At seven I began to write stories. I was
in bed with rheumatic fever. At fourteen,
I began to keep a diary, which has
continued. At twenty-one I had my
great rebellion. I tried to change
everything: my clothes and possessions,
how I thought and behaved, but the
deep self never changed. My mother
thought I’d lost my mind. My father
suggested Ethan Frome and other
humanists, since I was rejecting
Christianity. By 1965, when I was
twenty-eight, I’d divorced Tom, my
alcoholic husband, had a little girl
Amy, and was studying classics in
Berkeley. By 1972 I’d married Terry
and had a baby boy, Tim, and we’d
moved to North Carolina. I was
co-editor of Hyperion Poetry Magazine,
and we lived in an old farmhouse
in Cedar Grove. By July, I had a
baby girl, Ginia. In 1974 I left Terry
and went to live in Chapel Hill’s
Chase Park apartments, as one of
two white families. And I’d been
president of the small press
organization 1975-1978. In 1985 I
became an affiliate of the Durham
Arts Council. I had published many
books. By 1981 traveled to England
and Wales and Holland. By 1985 even
to Finland. And the children and I
were living on Barclay Rd. In Chapel
Hill, their favorite house and
neighborhood. By 1993 I’d left Carolina
Wren Press to others, and I’d been to
Russia twice, and Mikhail had come
to North Carolina once. In 1993 three
Russian writers had visited me for five
weeks, and my first grandchildren
were born, Megan and Will to Amy in
El Paso. I stayed ten months to care
for them. By 2000, I was living alone
in a small house in Moncure, making
friends here, and working on
environmental problems. By 2007 I had
two more grandchildren, Lilly and Bobby,
born to Ginia, and I helped with local
elections in Chatham County.
By 2014 the political situation became more
difficult and even worse in 2015, when
the state allowed coal ash to be dumped
in my new community. This finally
ended in 2020 when we won our court
case. We also had the Covid 19 pandemic
that year. I stayed home mostly. Now,
in 2021, I am eighty-four. I have lived
a good and productive life. I’ve suffered,
and so have my children, but I can’t
complain, nor do I wish to. Today
Ginia, Lilly, and Bobby will come
to have pizza with Tim and me.
I am grateful for these years, my work,
all my friends and loves. Perfection
is not my goal, but learning wisdom.
